"When Do I Get to Study?"

In spite of my earlier post about my own shortcomings the last few months, the Father has been busy at work around me. A friend has seen how my husband has cared for me since I broke my foot. I have been able to pray with her on a daily basis. A family member of hers is teaching one of our new teammates.

Our new teammate loves to study the Word! Each Friday she and her teacher read from the Good
News in order to learn vocabulary and practice pronunciation. Each afternoon when they have class, the teacher stops for a break to pray. The new teammate studies the Word while the teacher prays. The teacher has told my friend how much the new teammate loves to study.

My friend came to me to ask when she and I can study. She is begging to study the Word. She is hungry. Does my passion for the Word drive others to want to study it as well?  Based on the last couple of months, I would have to say not so much. However I desire to have that passion for the Word which my teammate has displayed for her teacher. "As the deer panteth for the water, so my soul longeth after Thee." Make this be true of me. Give me a greater passion and hunger for Your Word.

"Seven Days without a Quiet Time Makes One Weak" or "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"

Since the beginning of October when I broke my foot, I have had difficulty having my quiet time. I did not want to wake my husband by hobbling around on my crutches. I could not carry my own coffee, which I like to drink as I read the Word. I allowed myself to stay up late watching shows with my husband and slept in late in the mornings. Normally rest times would be another possible time to read and pray. However, I found myself so tired of hobbling around on the crutches that I decided to rest during the afternoons.

Therefore, for several weeks, I was having some time to read, but it was more like a drive thru than a sit down meal. Now while there are times and places for quick study times, most of us would all agree that fast food everyday for almost two months is not quality nutrition. This lack of nutrition began to take effect on my attitude and mood. I was not the wife and mother that my family need to be.

As the saying goes, " If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." I never really understood this phrase until recently. It is not that everyone is concerned about Mama, although they are. It is the fact that Mama is the thermostat in the home. This position is one that I have tried at times in the past to rebel against. I did not want to have that level of responsibility and did not want to have that pressure.  I wanted others, husband especially, to take responsibility for their own attitudes. Well, like it or not, that is a position that I took on when I said, "I do."  I further subjected myself to that position when I decided that I wanted to be a mother. I had no idea what I was asking for when I asked to be able to have a precious little one to cuddle in my arms.

Last weekend I came to the end of myself and realized I was collapsing. I was not able to show respect to my husband nor support him in the way he needed me to do. I was unable to handle the little stresses of everyday life. I was more than a grumpy grouch.

Monday I began waking up early again and reading the Word and praying like I had done in the past. I was able to have my coffee with my Creator. After one week of this, really just a couple of days, I was better equipped to love my husband and children as they needed and as I have been charged to do. I was better able to handle the daily stresses of life. While the last couple of months were not a stellar period of time for me, I am grateful for the opportunity once again to spend time and even to be reminded how much I need Him. When I am weak, He is strong!

Take Up Your Cross

As I lay this morning in the quiet solitude of my bedroom, which rarely ever happens, I took the time to read from the Word. I have been reading chronologically through it this year. I am currently reading about the life of the Son. A few days I read about His final entrance into the City before His death. Today's reading was about His final evening.

The Son was teaching His followers about His eminent crucifixion. His followers said that they would follow Him even unto death. They proclaimed to Him their undying devotion. A short while later they went together to the Garden. Out of His struggle, He went away to pray and asked His followers to do the same. Oddly enough, they were willing to go to death with Him, but they could not stay awake to pray.

How like us (me) is that?  I often am willing to do the big things but struggle over the "little" acts of obedience.

I also was struck by the love of the Son towards those He knew would betray Him. He knew exactly who was going to betray Him, and yet He lived with the betrayer for three years and even served him.   He knew who would deny Him three times, and yet He insisted that He must wash the denier's feet.

People are often put in our lives as a tool of sanctification for us, and we are in their lives as a tool of their sanctification as well. How often do we dismiss them from our lives because we don't like it? We don't like the drama. We don't like the sanctification process. It would be so much nicer if we could just go from the day of justification to heaven, but it does not work that way. The Refiner's fire burns!

Let us pray for eyes to see what the Father sees and to have a heart that is willing to be molded rather than running from it. Let us take up our cross daily.

Turning Back

Life here can often break your heart. Yesterday my heart was broken more than I think it ever has.

I had a visitor who said she was just passing by and wanted to say hi. She refused to stay long, though I begged her to sit several times. She said she needed to leave and started to walk out the door. I told her that I would be happy to start studying with her whenever she had the chance, and she walked out the gate.

This visitor is one who we met during our last term. She had met some previous workers and had a copy of the Word that they had given her. She told me she was studying in secret and yet her family had found out. They were putting pressure on her to come back to their way and wanted her to marry a man not of her new faith. I prayed with her many times and studied with her when I could. A year before we left, she left our town to study in the capital. Just before we returned, I found out that she had given birth to a baby girl.  Since we returned to our town, she has returned as well. She has been friendly, occasionally visiting me. However things seemed different.

Shortly after she left, she came back in the gate. She gave me the news that she had gone back to her family's faith because of pressure from her father. I am sure she feels the pressure more so with needing to also provide for her baby.  I encouraged her in the need to respect parents. I confessed to her that I really do not understand that kind of pressure, but I know that The Son does. He said that we would be hated because He was hated, and we would be beaten because He was beaten. I told her that there are other followers in the villages who are being beaten by their families and yet holding firm. I prayed with her to be shown the True Way and to have courage to follow it.

The Word teaches that it is better for the one who never knew than for the one who knew and turned back. Lift up this young lady to know His Truth!

Blessings of a Broken Foot

So, isn't getting out to share the whole reason why I am here?

Well...let me reflect on some blessings of the broken foot for a moment.

My kids are super and are great helpers. They have stepped up to help far more than I have been calling on them to do since our return here and certainly more than they did in the states. William and Mariama have done tons of chores, including making dinners and washing dishes. Lydia-Ann has even been a big helper in various chores as well as serving me water. I already knew I had great kids, but I have been able to appreciate them at a whole new level.

Speaking of my kids, I have had time to just spend time with them, when I might have tried to do something else. I played more with Lydia-Ann in those first few days than I have in a long time. I have taken the time to watch shows and movies with the kids that I generally do not do. I have had the opportunity to show love to my children through quality time at a new level.

My neighbors who hear about my foot have come to visit me. What a treat! I just do not get many visits on a regular basis. Some are friends who might come by occasionally, but they have come by more often knowing I cannot come to see them. Some are people who have never come to see me. Wow! Could these be open doors? Maybe. I will need to be seeking out answers to that question.

My husband is awesome! I already knew that! However, he has shown his love and care for me at a new level.  Cooking and taking care of the kids so that I can get out has been a pattern for him, but really taking care of me has not always been necessary. It is not something that just I see, but I know my kids are seeing it too. In addition those seeing our family interact are seeing the witness. I have had the chance to see my friend who is in a difficult marriage. Her husband continues to tire her, as she says. I pray with her daily and she has felt the effects in her heart of my prayers. This friend has seen me at some of my very worst moments, so she is under no illusion that I am perfect. I am trying to live a life that blesses. Due to the witness of our marriage and the effects of prayer with her, she has expressed a strong desire to study the Good News once I am recovered and able to do more.

Wow! That is what I came here to do, to share as I am going, or not going as the case may be.

Perils of a Broken Foot

This post will be followed by a blessings post, so if it gets a little too whiny, just go to the next post.

How did I brake my foot?
Well, I tripped while walking in platform flip-flops at the market.
Why would I wear those flip-flops?
Well, in those I could step into puddles in the road without getting water on the top where my feet rested. While I have good, sturdy Chacos, I just do not like wet feet, especially with yucky water.
Was I running?
No oddly enough, I was just trying to cross the street, however I was trying to be quick about it, because crossing the market street is like playing Frogger. However, most people know I do not have a slow speed, so it is generally fast and faster.

So with all of this, I think how crazy it was that my outer foot bone fractured just while I crossed the street. How much of an idiot am I to do such a thing? (No comments from the peanut gallery please.)

Frustrations just pile up! I want to bake and have really enjoyed doing so lately. Well, not much hope of that happening, because my foot is supposed to be propped up. Kind of hard to prop it up and still stand in the kit hen long enough to mix something from scratch.

While I am talking about the baking, frustrating to not be able to take care of my family by providing them with good, healthy food. My grandmother took care of her family with food and lots of it. I am not to her level yet, but I do serve my family in this way. So not only am I not able to do something I enjoy doing, I am not able to show love to my family in this way.

I am much more of a doer. I see that something needs to be done and do it. I don't call for someone to take care of it.  I am even guilty of picking something up that belongs to the kids, because it would be quicker for me to just do it myself. Well, that does not work so well when you are propped up and are  using crutches even when you are moving. I hate feeling like I am bossing people around. My loving husband had all of his work and home responsibilities, and I was having to give him mine as well. If  he was taking care of business, but it was time for the kids to eat, I would have to call for him to stop what he was doing. The first weekend after returning with the cast, I did way too much because I just saw and did. My husband, even after all these years, thinks I would actually say I need help or admit I cannot do something. (Heehee! You would think he would know me better.)  Instead, I did too much and my foot swelled and was in pain. I got in trouble with him for not telling him what I needed.

So not only am I restricted by what I can do around the house, I am basically restricted to my house. There is no such thing as sidewalks here, so I cannot get out. I have enough trouble walking with these crutches in the house, much less try to walk through the dirt road outside. It gets lonely because I want to be out. I want to visit my neighbors. I want to go places without having my husband drive me. I want to go dump the trash. I had an occasion yesterday to take the kids to the pool for a play date. I could not drive myself, so my husband had to take me. Unfortunately, he also had a meeting at the same time. We moved the meeting so he would not be alone with the woman with whom he was meeting, and I could still have my ride. However, that was not a great idea and their meeting got more interrupted than I would have liked. I will not be doing that again for a few weeks.

I like visiting my neighbors. I like being out among the people. I like going to pray with my sisters in the faith. Not getting out to do those things is driving me crazy. I like going out to share. Isn't that what I came here to do?

What Culture do You Live In?

I am proud to be an American. I am, even with all the conflict these days, I am proud of our American heritage. I am blessed with an education to which many around the world do not have access. I am blessed to be related to many military, some of who have died for their country or come back forever changed by their experiences. I have been blessed with freedom to seek God and follow the route He has laid out for me. I am blessed to have a husband who pursued me, rather than a marriage that was arranged for me. I am blessed with an independent and adventurous spirit.  I love different kinds of clothes: dresses and heels; shorts and tank tops with sandals; and jeans with boots.  I still think our republic for the people and by the people is the best government out there, even if I do not agree with a lot of things that have gone on lately, but even being able to say I disagree is an American freedom.

However, I live among a people that would be thrilled to make in a year what most Americans make in a week. They must choose which books they will have that year for school because they cannot afford them all and the schools do not loan them out for the year.  However, this culture values people. You would not dare pass someone without greeting them, especially if you make eye contact with them. Even if you are late for something, you still greet and ask about one's family and everyone's health. They take time to drink tea together.  The women traditionally dress in a way as to show respect for their husband, that their body is not for the world but their husband alone.  The women cover their heads if they are married, and other men respect that.  Here the people do not hesitate to discipline their neighbors' children or at least take the child to their parent. Here they respect their elders and care for them. Here your neighbors are your first family, not just the family you are related to by blood.

Every culture has its aspects that are good, bad, and indifferent. We have to look at the culture in which we live in light of the Good News. Some of my American-ness is good, but some of it is not. Some of my host culture is good, but some of it is not. As followers of the Way, we must be focused on the Good News culture. Will it be awkward and hard sometimes? Sure. Is it what we are called to do as brothers and sisters? Yep. Just because my culture says it is ok to say or do something does not necessarily mean that I should. Let us be salt and light wherever we are today.

Remembering the Dead

Everyone has had a loved one die. Most of us remember the loved one. We remember them to differing degrees. It depended on how close we were to the individual or how old we were at the time. A wife may particularly remember the last time she said, "I love you," to her husband before he died. A mother may remember the first and last times she held her child.

In the culture within which we live, it is a bit weightier than that. A sacrifice is offered up when the person dies in order to ask for God to extend the hand of peace to the loved one. It is repeated again forty days after the death to ask for welcoming on behalf of the dead, if the family is able to afford to do so.

For those who are really wealthy, they will continue to offer a sacrifice on the yearly anniversary of the loved one's death.  These sacrifices are two-fold in nature. On one hand, they continue to pray that the loved one will be given entrance into paradise, if they have not been admitted already. Secondly, the prayers request graciousness and mercy to be given to those who continue to remember their dead loved ones.

Having had loved ones die, I still remember them. I remember the fun times. For my brother, I remember my last moments with him, even 21 years later. However, I have peace knowing in whom they trusted. I know the One who told the thief, "Today, you will be with me in paradise." So glad I know the Author of grace and peace and need not go through my ancestors to plead for these gifts. There is a way to have assurance of eternity. He said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no ones comes to the Father but through me." Resting in His grace!

An Unexpected Invitation!

Almost as soon as we arrived in our town, we had to get started with school. We had a conference scheduled for October and November, so we needed to get ahead before a seven week break. The rains were still heavy then, so it was no big deal for us to not get out then. About four weeks into school, we found out the conference was postponed/ cancelled.  Suddenly that pressure to get ahead in school was removed. However, after seven weeks of school and the rains slowing, we knew it was time to get out to the villages to greet.

I had suggested to Rich that we make a tour of some villages, even maybe spending the night in the farthest one out, and then visiting more villages on the way home. My husband, wise as he is, thought it better for us to try to do only a couple of villages and then come back in town for the night. He was right. The children are not yet used to being out in the village and more so not used to travelling those bumpy roads.

We set out on our journey. Only about ten minutes down the road, Rich realized he did not mean to go that way. He turned the truck around and took another path. What a gift we had as a large group of baboons got off of the road in front of us and then sat watching us, as still as we sat watching them. One of those moments just because we can!

After we finally arrived at the first village, a young brother greeted us and then left to the next village up the road. We greeted for the death and the kids played a little, but the conversation was not productive.  Rich got a call from one of the other young brothers. The one we had seen had told the others who were meeting up the road that we were there. They called to invite us to come join them. This was not the plan that we had, but we rejoiced at the invitation.

We showed up and greeted six brothers, some as new as a month ago. They were meeting inside of a hut and invited us to join them. We listened as they read and studied the word together. They invited Rich to share from the Word as well.  They asked me to share a word, but I did not feel clear direction about which one to share, so I passed. So instead, they asked me to pray as we closed. A humbling experience I assure you, knowing the trials that these men were facing or would face.

We ate lunch with them. We listened to the Word on a recording. What a blessed time of fellowship. Looking forward to doing that again, especially with one of the wives who is a sister as well. For once, it felt like we were a part of the Family, not white or black. We are one in the bond of love.....

Toubaako!

If I never hear that word yelled at me again, that will be just fine with me. "Second term blues."  That is what they call it. When you return to a place you have been before, yet all those things you thought you were used to aggravate you more than they did before. A few aggravations are on my list, but none greater these days than being called, "Toubaako!" or "White foreigner!"

Sometimes it is an innocent child who just does not know any better. Little children are often more open and honest than we really want them to be. For instance, I go out with my three-year-old to visit. I really want to stay and talk, but she keeps begging to go home. I cannot hide that from those whom we are visiting. When a small child is calling to me, I can suggest that they call me a name they would use for their mother or aunt, because the chances are good that I am older than their mother.

However, when a teenager or, worse yet, an adult yells at me, I just want to scream. The culturally correct response to them is to call out in their language, "Black person."  Maybe it is because of my daddy being from Alabama. Maybe I heard too many things said regarding a person's color having grown up in Louisiana. Maybe I became more sensitive after the race riots in Shreveport when I was in middle school. I just cannot seem to bring myself to use this culturally appropriate response. The few times that I did bring myself to say it, I had a bad taste in my mouth.

I try to dress like the people here. I speak their language. No matter what I do, I will always be different by my skin color. It is not that I mind being different. I know that there are some ways that I am different because of my faith and that is not a problem. I just want to stand out for the right reasons.

Last week, we were studying the founding of Jamestown.  A light went on inside my head. It is no wonder that white people are seen as they are after how the French came here to colonize. It was likely a very similar impression as that given to the Native Americans by the Spanish and English. Father, help me to elevate these people, and help them to see their value through Your eyes.

Sunday, as we met for worship, it occurred to me that I am here to stand out. No matter how much Jesus tried to blend in, even taking on the clothing of a man, he could not help but stand out. By no means am I Jesus, but he sent his followers, of which I am one, out to be different.   Lord, when I stand out because of my skin color, help me to shine forth Your light with a holy glow.

A Friend's Marriage

I had seen my friend several times in a week. She seemed to be weighed down by something but she was not yet willing to share what was going on inside her.

One day, I offered to help her by loaning her some money to take care of her diabetic husband who was injured and needed to go to the doctor. The flood gates opened and she poured out her heart.

Her husband apparently has another woman in another town, which is another reason for him to go there in addition to taking care of some family property.  My friend works to pay for everything that she and her son need. Her husband, while not making much money and for the most part unemployed, sends what money he does get, she suspects, to the other woman.

As if this were not enough, she lives in the home with her husband's family. She feels like an outsider in her own home, as if everyone else in the family knows what is going on besides her. Praying for my dear friend in a difficult situation.

Another Talibe story.

Shortly after we returned to our town and began to get settled into our home, I was visited by one of our neighborhood boys. He was coming to greet us, since we had not yet seen us. He is one of the boys who had befriended my children and yet he has no mother and father. For whatever reason, he had been given to a religious leader as a young boy.

While talking with him, I noticed that his finger was swollen. Upon inspection, I discovered a large gash on his finger had gone untreated and was now infected.  He said it had been a long time, maybe a couple of weeks, since he got wounded.  I tried to treat it, but I knew that putting on some antibiotic ointment and a bandage this late was not going to do much.

I was so frustrated. I was frustrated that he had not been taken to the doctor when it happened to get stitches. I was frustrated that he was still not taken to the doctor even when it got infected. I had house guests at the time, as well, who were thankfully wise enough to know what type of medicine he needed to treat the infection.

I weighed my options of taking him to the hospital and waiting forever to get told a whole host of medications that he did not necessarily need or going to the pharmacy to just get an antibiotic. I finally went to the pharmacy to purchase the medicine. I had the boy come to my house each morning and evening for 10 days to get the medicine from me. I honestly did not trust his care taker to give him the medicine, if he was not willing to take him to get the medicine himself. I changed his bandage every couple of days and applied antibiotic ointment as well. I watched him take the antibiotic, which he had never had. He chewed it up. Yuck!  Nonetheless, he took it.

After a week, he was impressed that it was healing. I told him we could not stop until the antibiotic was gone. It healed and the boy was able to go back to doing what he needed to do. It breaks my heart to see these boys so not cared for by those who are supposed to be teaching them about God. Of course, even if he had been with his family and had gotten hurt, it is possible that he would not have gotten treatment then either. They just would not have had the money for the medicine. It is so humbling when just twelve dollars stands between them and healing. We are so very rich!

Sometimes Life is all about Perspective!

A week ago, my husband and I were talking with our teammate across the ocean. It was so good to see her face and talk about some things that have been going on there lately. 

First, she informed us that a young man from one of the villages that we have all spent a lot of time in passed away that day. He had been slightly sick the week before, but they had heard nothing more than that until they heard that he had died. My heart sank and I was saddened for the other young believers in his town, since there were so few of them already. 

Second, she gave us some good news that a village that has been rather apathetic to the gospel was begging them to come weekly to share the good news. This is remarkable in that a man from this village had asked them to come teach him, but they had been unable to find him. On this visit when the village was inviting our teammates to come, they actually found this man. The Father's timing is always perfect. 

I walked away from our talk with my teammates with a bittersweet feeling after receiving this good and bad news. Even as we went to a fellowship with friends that night, my heart was heavy and I shared that with a couple of people. Funnily enough, as we watched a fireworks show with these friends that night, I heard clearly from the Father that the news we had heard was great news and great news. 

First, that young man was no longer in pain or sickness. He was standing before the Almighty and giving Him praise. He did not see it as bad news. Was it going to be sad for his friends? Yes, but the Father can bring them new friends. Was it hard to see our number of brothers and sisters dwindle, when the numbers were so low already? Yes, but the Almighty is capable of using this event to draw others unto Himself. Was it hard to think about what would be done with his body? Yes, but that is all it is, a shell of who he was. Revelation 7:9 promises a multitude of every tribe, tongue, and nation will be in heaven, so that have to get there somehow.  I was reminded to praise Him because He is working out His promises. Bad news for us is really great news in view of eternity. 

Second, it was not just good news that our friends were being invited to this formerly apathetic village. It was great news! Only the Almighty can change the hearts of man and orchestrate time in this way. The timing was especially significant in light of the fact that the month of fasting was approaching, and yet the village drew closer to The Son, rather that retreating as many do as that month approaches. Lifting up those within this village and asking for them to have dreams of the truth of the Word they hear. 

Give me Your eyes, Father, and help me to see things around me the way You see them. 

Confessions and the Song of Solomon

Personal Confessions and Lessons from Song of Solomon
I have been very reflective the last few months. Some people say that we should not look back because it is Satan trying to discourage us. However, I have found in scripture that they were to set up stones of remembrance for times of God's great deliverance as well as God's judgement. There was also a time that one record of an event said that it was "the anger of The Lord" while another record attributes the work to Satan. I think the difference in Satan bringing up our past and God's drawing us to those stones of remembrance is how we feel afterwards. Satan's work results in discouragement and shame, while God's work results in gratitude for God's protection and forgiveness.
One area that I have been reflecting on quite a bit, especially after getting together with high school friends the other night, has been my relationships to the opposite sex back in high school. I always had at least one boy that my sights were set on, and I was rather determined in focus. It was such a joke that I was actually given what was called the "sharking" award. I think that many saw it as innocent from the outside but did not know how deep my issues were. In hindsight as an adult now, I wish that someone had given me a Gibbs' slap and asked me, "what in the world are you thinking?"
I felt called to ministry and missions as a sixteen year old. Unfortunately, at that age, I was more focused on missionary dating. To make it worse, I got more focused on the dating aspect rather than the missionary one. I did a great disservice to those young men, because I did not offer them a true Christian witness. To those men, I apologize for not pointing you to The Lord.
When I did take a break from my "missionary dating", I actually set my sights on good boys from church. Many a time I was distracting them from what The Lord wanted to say to them. I was not edifying to my brothers in Christ. To those men, I apologize for causing you to stumble.
So what does this have to do with the Songs of Solomon?
As a youth, I had understood that the Songs were a spiritual symbol of God's love for us. When I got to college, those who were more worldly than I was told me about the physical imagery. As I have grown older, I have learned to see the beautiful image of marriage on varying levels that is depicted within the pages. As I read it again the other day, I saw a new lesson that I wish I had learned years ago.
"I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases, " is repeated three times, including in Song of Solomon 2:7. I used to think that it said not to "awaken my love". However I realized the other day that it was saying love in general and is directed to the young maidens. It is a direction to the young maidens to not entice or arouse love until the proper time. When the time is right, love will come. When I was a maiden, I was trying to do lots of stirring up. Oh, what heartbreak I would have saved myself, and some young men, if I had just waited "until it pleases." How I wish I had been advised to be careful about stirring up through the way I dressed or the way I behaved. Then again maybe I was advised, but I just did not listen. Men are so visual, as the language of Song of Solomon reflects, and any help they get from a young maiden can trigger their imagination. We must be careful as Godly maidens, young and old, to be aware of how our clothing might cause our Christian brothers to stumble in their faith.
In conclusion, I am so grateful for how God protected me and preserved me from a life that could have turned out very different by taking many of those young men out of my life in one way or another. I am grateful that we did not have the modes of communication that we have now when I was a teenager, because I likely would have gotten into much more trouble than I did. I am thankful for those who were praying for me, even when they did not know how close to the edge I was. I pray that I will teach my daughters to be patient and "not stir up or awaken love until it pleases." I actually find myself thankful for how the culture I live in most of the time does overall concern itself with the way a maiden presents herself in her dress, and I find it makes me more conscious of how I myself dress now.

Random Obscure Women of the Bible

I wrote an earlier post about women at different stages of life being used by God. One of those women was Jael, who was used to kill Sisera, an enemy of the Israelites. She was simply at her home, doing the work of her stage of life, who was given the opportunity to aid in defeating the enemy. In addition to Jael, The Lord has been revealing to me other unnamed obscure women of the Bible that He used for His purposes.

In 2 Samuel 17, a woman was at her home, where two servants of David sought refuge. They hid in the well. She spread a cloth over the well and then the grain over the cloth. This is a task she likely would have been doing anyway, such that the pursuers would have thought nothing of it. Once the pursuers were gone, she helped them out and they returned to David. She was faithfully administering her duties while keeping her eyes open for opportunities to be used by The Lord.

In 2 Samuel 20, Joab was pursuing the enemies of David. The enemies had fled into a city. A woman in the city called to Joab that was about to overtake the city. She asked for what reason Joab was there. After Joab told her, she vowed to throw the enemy head over the wall. She went to the other citizens. They worked together to kill the enemy. They threw the head over and the town was saved. A woman just doing what she would have been doing had the awareness and boldness to seize the opportunity amidst going about her daily work.

Though no one may ever know my name, maybe I will be faithful to serve The Lord in the every day activities of caring for my family and home.

Thank you Lord that I am not God!

I recently found myself very tired of repeating myself. I had been telling my children every day that I needed their attention to our school activities. We were trying to get school work done and get ready for our crate to come. It was a lot of distractions, and they are just kids. It was taking everything I had to not lose focus and get off schedule. I was tired of begging them to stay focused. As I went to the bathroom to find what solitude I could, I realized how little I was getting frustrated about.

I was getting tired of reminding two children of one thing for a few days. God has to repeat Himself on a daily basis to billions of people, some who say they want to follow but do not stay on task and some who have no interest in listening. Thank you Lord for not yet getting exasperated with me like I was with my children. Help me to show that same patience with my children.

So a week later I was dealing with my dramatic child. Mariama had been disobeying me in small ways all morning. I would say something to correct her and then she would immediately apologize. A few minutes later I would be correcting her for something else and hearing the same apology. I exploded when she tried to apologize the fourth time. I just could not hear that same, seemingly fake apology one more time. I found myself in the shower crying because I had gotten so tired of forgiving to have her do it again. Once again I heard those same words from The Lord. If you Lord can be patient with billions of people, you can give me the patience I need to continue to instruct my children. Thank you Lord that I am not You because I would not make it one minute without running out of patience.

"Train up a child I the way he should go...." has so many more applications than we generally realize. Children need training, which is why we are commanded to do it. Training is not a one time task, but it requires purposeful daily repetition. It is not a lecture. It is not even teaching, generally considered to be telling and then letting the listener do. It is a walking alongside hand in hand. The Lord is daily training me to be a trainer of my children, taking me daily by the hand to know how to take them by the hand as well.

Husbands, Love Your Wives

Recently, I shared a post from another blog about Opposite World, which reminded women to respect their husbands. Women are commanded by God to respect their husbands in Ephesians 5.  It occurred to me that the instructions in the Bible are given because it involves our true needs or addresses struggles we all have.
For instance, it tells us 365 times in one way or another, "do not fear."  Why would it need to say it for every day of the year if we were not prone to fear? It is an area in which we all struggle at one time or another, to some degree.
Parents are instructed to train their children in the way they should go and when they are old, they will not depart from it. Parents are instructed in Deuteronomy to teach and train them in the every day activities of life. Why does it say that? Children need instruction and training. We are not to let them go and discover on their own and expect them to just figure it out. They need instruction and it is the job of the parents to give it.

Men need to feel respected, and the man's wife is responsible for giving that respect. When a man feels the respect of his wife, he can soar to heights even he never believed he could. When she respects her husband, it is easier for their children to respect and obey their father.

Conversely, the Bible instructs men to love their wives as their own bodies, as Christ loved the church. What did Christ do for the church? Jesus gave Himself up for the church, dying on the cross that they might be made holy. Men are instructed to love their wives because love is what women need. They need to feel loved.  When they feel loved, they feel more capable to do all that they need to do as well.  In thinking about loving of wives in "opposite world," I wanted to share some really great single-moment example.
At first, the big example that came to mind was that of a friend of mine. My friend is a physician and her husband is a pilot in the Air Force. They have three precious little boys. Recently they came to a point of decision about the next step in their future.  Being ranked among the top ten of pilots in the Air Force, he was pursued for a very promising career which would  have been the envy of many, especially any that might have political ambitions. However, this new position would have meant a lot of traveling away from his wife and three boys. My friend's husband realized that he alone was charged with being the spiritual head of his home to raise his boys, and he alone is given the task of loving my friend. He has been quoted publicly as saying of her, "You make me want to come home." So instead of pursuing this career advancement, my friend's husband gave his notice and will be retiring from the Air Force early next year.  That is loving his wife in "opposite world."

As I continued thinking about this topic though, it occurred to me that most men may never have such a dramatic story to tell. However, most men have the opportunity to love their wives like my husband loves me. Rich cooks often, and not just his amazing pizza, because he likes to cook and because it is a way to help care for me.  He helps sweep the house and mop the floor when things have gotten crazy busy. He helps finish the laundry when I am out doing ministry. To some in America, this may not seem like a big deal. However, where we live most of the time, a husband who watches the kids so his wife can go out and helps around the house is very much so opposite to the rest of the culture.

Husbands, love your wives. I have often said, long before I was married, that if a man loved me like the Bible commanded, then I would have zero problem in respecting him.  To be honest though, I do not have that luxury. I am commanded to respect my husband, whether he loves me not. Thankfully he does love me very much, but even he has gone through periods of struggle like job loss and been discouraged.

Seasons of a Woman's Life---Judges

I often struggle, as I eluded to in an earlier blog, with wanting to do it all. I want to be involved in everything, but I just cannot do it all and do it well. For this season of my life, my husband and my children especially take up the greatest portion of my time. God has been revealing this idea of seasons in my life for a while now. The Proverbs 31 woman did not do it all at once, but rather those words were true of her over the course of her life. Today as I was reading in Judges, I was reading about Deborah as well as Jael.

I have often been struck by the idea of Deborah as a prophetess, not because I do not think a woman could be a prophetess but rather wondering how she had time. I have at times wondered if she was a single woman who thus had more time.  In her song however, she tells of herself being a mother in Israel. So how did she have time? I think the opening of her scene gives it away. She was sitting under the tree hearing people's cases and making judgements. She was at a season in life when her children were grown and did not need her constant watchful eye. Maybe she was widowed and did not need to be caring for the home and her husband. She had come to that season in her life.

Jael however was in a different season in her life. Jael was at her tent when Sisera, the enemy of Israel, came near. Maybe she was cooking the next meal or doing laundry. Maybe the kids were playing out back or even taking a nap. Whatever the case, she was taking care of the family and home at the right time for God to use her. Her season of life was not a curse nor inconvenience but rather God's providential timing.  Her husband was known to be a friend of the king for whom Sisera served, and he sought refuge in her home. She hospitably gave him milk to drink when he asked for something to drink, thus he did not suspect what she would do next. Now most of us stay at home moms are not going to be hiding a general in one of our rugs and then stabbing him through the temple with a peg, but God desires to use us exactly where we are if we will be obedient and seek those moments. This season of life does not mean we are not also doing His work, but it just will look differently than what someone in another season would be doing.

So what season are you in? How can God use the season you are in? Rejoice in what God is desiring to do in and through you today!

Fanatics of Faith!

I had an interesting visit last night with a Muslim family who live near us.. Today I kept thinking about some things that the husband shared with me as we talked. Maybe some time I will add to this how I knew this family, as I did earlier when I first wrote this blog, but for now I will get to the heart of the matter.

The man shared how unfortunate it is that so many view all Muslims in light of 9-11.  He shared how the men that did those things got their punishment and will be punished, implying punishment from God. However, many have preconceived ideas about he and his wife in particular because of the events from that day. People tend to view them though eyes of fear or hate without really even knowing them. People hear the word jihad and take it out of context. Jihad has three meanings, the greater of which is "the struggle by a believer to fulfill his religious duties." For him, "Going to work is a jihad. Taking care of my family is a jihad." Muslims get called "Fanatics."

However, "Christians can be Fanatics too," he said. Christians do not want to listen to them or talk to them out of that fear or hate or both.  On a related humorous note, he pointed out that his wife's head being covered should not be an issue, since the Virgin Mary is often portrayed with her head covered.

It grieved me to hear this man talk about these things.  I wondered how open he would be to hear the Good News if more Christians were loving as Jesus loved. It seems to me that Christians often fall into one pit or another. Either we want to love everyone but never get around to sharing the Truth, or we want to beat people over the head with the Bible but do not love them.

Jesus was truly a master of doing both. Jesus called to Zaccheus to eat with him and yet obviously spoke Truth in such a way that Zaccheus was going to make things right with those from whom he stole. Jesus showed compassion to the woman caught in adultery when others wanted to stone her, and yet he told her to go and sin no more.  Jesus loved fanatically!

Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13 that we are clanging cymbals if we do all these things and yet do not have love.  Lord, forgive me for the times I have been a clanging cymbal. Lord, forgive me for being a stumbling block to those who needed you by my refusal to extend a hand to them or to eat with them. Lord, help me to Love fanatically!

As a side note, I found it amusing that the day after this conversation with this man, Facebook and the media are filled with passionate arguments from both sides of the same sex marriage rights act versus traditional marriage and the Starbucks ban. Does arguing and saying nasty things about one another really make our point? Wouldn't we get a lot farther if we actually discussed things like normal human beings over a cup of tea?

God's Protection from Overcommitment of Women

This morning as I read in Numbers, I found myself with lots of questions. Regarding men and making oaths, it simply said that they were to keep them. Regarding women and oath making, it went on and on about how the oath could be nulled if the father of the young girl or the husband of the woman decided it should not be.

I am not a feminist by any means, which my sister in law could tell you, however I am a product of my culture in some ways. I began questioning why it was that men had to keep oaths, but the oath of a woman could be overturned. Then it hit me.....

Maybe it is because we as women are proned to over commit and find it difficult to say no. Could it be that God was providing a safe guard for us to not be so stressed out? I see so many of my friends that are trying so hard to do it all, and I confess I can be right there with them. We want to do everything for everyone but that is not how it was intended to be.

Titus 2:3-5 tells us that the older woman is to "train the younger woman to love her husband and her children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to her own husband, that the Word of God may not be reviled."  We are the only ones who are to love our husbands and we are the ones that God gave our children to, so those are jobs that no one else can really do for us.

It's not modern nor fashionable. Some may think I just stepped out of the Stone Age and that's ok. I'm not saying that women cannot do other things or work or whatever, but I do think there is clear provision of an "out" for those times that we feel overcommitted and overwhelmed. I have found myself in that place of trying to do too much, and it has been my husband who helps me realize it and weed out what is unnecessary. I am thankful for him and that my sanity has been saved many times because of his direction in this area.

New Vision, what does it look like?

I talked in my last post about a need for renewed vision. When we went to Disney, I had a plan. I had a very detailed plan. So why would I have anything less than a detailed plan to share the Gospel? Is it because I am lazy? Is it because I want to be "holy" to leave room for the Spirit? I confess it  is probably a lot more of the first than the last.

Thus this time in the states has been great. Not only have the food and fellowship been great, but it has been great for renewing my vision of how The Lord might work through me to reach those to whom He has called me.

As I was reading this morning in Numbers, I was reading the account of the twelve spies who went for forty days to the Promised Land to bring back a report. All the spies were in agreement over the wonder of the new land. Only two however came back with assurance from The Lord about their ability to take the land with Him on their side. Forty days of looking and praying over the land should have been followed by the Israelites taking over the land. Instead, they trusted in what they could see and feared those inhabiting the land rather than The Lord. The Lord impressed upon me a vision, or game plan if you will, for how He wants to work through me when we return.

When we were there this last time, I developed a pattern of home schooling for six weeks and then taking one week off. I used that week to get out and share. Unfortunately, I looked at that six week period as just time for school rather than as preparation for that week off. This morning it occurred to me that six weeks is equivalent to forty days. What would happen if I used that six weeks of school as time to look and pray over the land before going in to conquer as it were?  What if I spent extra time praying and greeting in homes and getting introduced to new people through contacts that I already have during that six weeks? Then during that one week off, I could go to share boldly in those places that The Lord has revealed during that six week period.

As if I needed any confirmation, and honestly I am a slow learner, so I probably did, I was reminded of how often in the Word that forty days was used to prepare for something. It rained for forty days and nights while Noah was in the ark. Moses went to the mountain for forty days to receive the Big 10 and then again he went to the mountain. The spies went into the land forty days.  Forty days Goliath came out to taunt the Israelites.  Forty days is how long it took Elijah to walk to Horeb. Jonah was preaching in Nineveh for forty days before going to the hill top to watch for the destruction and to pout.  Jesus went to the wilderness for forty days.  in Acts 1, Jesus revealed himself resurrected to His followers over the course of forty days. Lord, help me to see how best to use my forty days and to allow You to renew my vision in that time.

Need for new vision!

I learned a lot of lessons on our recent trip to Disney.  Among others was the importance of having a plan. I also learned the importance of being flexible and holding loosely to that plan, but that is not the focus of this blog. The focus today is the importance of the plan, the vision, if you will. God's Word tells us that where there is no vision, the people perish. How true that is! If we do not have a plan to reach others, the people who have not yet heard will indeed perish.

In worship today, our pastor, Dr. Chuck Pourciau, preached the Word from Luke 13:22-30. He talked about the one that came to Jesus asking about those who were true followers of Jesus, as opposed to those merely following along for what they might get out of it. Jesus' response was not to worry about the others that were or were not following Him, but to point the one questioning him to truly follow.

Maybe the one questioning Jesus wanted to belittle Jesus for having so few actually saved. Maybe he was wanting to know what his odds were if he put off following. Maybe, as those with whom we work, he was wanting to know what type of faith fellowship/ community he would have if he left the religious community in which he grew up. Either way Jesus reminded the questioner that it was more important to concerned about his own spiritual condition than others. This can be difficult but is necessary.

Just as procrastinating to make a decision to follow Jesus can result in the perishing of the procrastinator, so too can the procrastination on the part of the true follower of Jesus result in the perishing of many who have never heard. People are literally dying daily without that personal relationship that they need to know Christ in order to enter heaven. If we are truly believing that Jesus is indeed "the Way, the Truth, and The Life," then we have to be sharing that fact.

So what does that have to do with the vision? It is to constantly agonize/ deeply desire to be more committed to Him and to sharing Him with others. Am I doing that really? I confess I am not and often grow complacent. Forgive me, Father, for my apathy.

One of the first missionary families.

Once again, this whole reading through the Bible chronologically this year has been great. No matter how many times a person has read the Bible or how well they think they know the stories, it is always possible to glean something new.  God's Word is alive and active!

As I was reading through the story of Moses' call to return to Egypt and deliver the Israelites from the hand of Pharoah, I was struck anew by some points. I don't know why, but I have had it in my mind that Moses went alone before meeting up with Aaron. However, the Word actually tells that his wife and children went with him. For Moses, in many ways, it was like going home, though tension was expected because of how he had left. For his wife and children, though, it was a whole new unfamiliar world.

Aaron coming to meet them was likely comforting for Moses but uncomfortable for his wife. Thankfully though she had someone she knew and someone who would be on their side.  But what was life like for Zipporah?

Was she at home all day? Did she have any friends? How did she encourage Moses when he came home at the end of the day after a bad encounter with Pharoah? Was she able to set aside her own loneliness to encourage him to keep doing what God had commanded? As Pharoah put more pressure on the people and the people resented Moses even coming, did she struggle more with any relationships she did have? Was she bitter at any point and suggest that they leave? Did she create a haven for Moses to come to at night where he could truly rest?

Did Moses at any point think about throwing in the towel because of the toil it was taking on his family? Did he ever think of turning back with them, when he would have certainly stayed on his own? Did he ever wish they were not with him in the midst of the plagues?

How would I have reacted to everything if I had been Zipporah? Would I have been a sustaining force for my husband? Or would I have been an excuse for him to back out?  Wherever we are, am I being that support for my husband to continue the job that God has given him, to bring the message of deliverance to a people that are crying out to God and the message of pending judgement to those who do not fear God?

Unexpected!

We did lots of traveling in the month of January. One night as we were actually here in Shreveport, we were having dinner with some friends and another family. During the course of the evening, we were getting to know this other family and the connections that they have with out country. We shared funny moments as well as precious stories about the people where we live. They informed us that there is a woman from our country in our town. I had no reason to doubt this couple but also found the idea of people from our country living here completely surprising.

So the next day, I am anxious to find out if this is true. I went to the place that these new friends had told me about to find this woman. I walked in and hesitantly began to greet her in her language. She almost exploded with joy hugging me and chatting for quite a while. In that time, she told me that she was working at this place for a friend of hers. She also told me about a shop that her friend's husband has just down the street. We had a nice conversation but I still could hardly believe it.

So a little while later that afternoon, my husband and I went to go find the little shop. My husband and the man talked in both languages, though mostly English as the man has been in the states for about 20 years. We chatted a bit more and ended with talking about getting together some time.

Surprise! Two days later the man called and invited us over for dinner with his family. We gladly accepted. The man and his wife were to greet us into their home. Their son was there and invited our children to watch TV with him. The wife was dressed in clothing from our country. The food was authentic. The juice they had to drink was authentic. If it had not been for the English mixed into the conversation, I would have had to remind myself where I was, because the feeling was so familiar.

We had a wonderful evening of food and conversation. We will look forward to getting back together with this family in the next few months.  A very unexpected surprise!

No pride or jealousy?

As I said, I have been reading through the Bible in a year chronologically. I am currently in Exodus. Recently Moses came down from the mountain with the tablets on which the Ten
Commandments were written and threw them down at the sight of the people worshipping a golden calf.

Before going up the mountain, the people promised to adhere to all that Moses had passed on to them from God. Moses went to the mountain for about a month and a half. In that time, the people grew weary of Moses being gone and begged Aaron to make an idol for them to worship. Aaron told him to bring their gold to him, which they melted down and then fashioned a calf out of the god to be worshipped. When Moses came down, Aaron seems to be saying that the calf just jumped out of the gold on its own.

Meanwhile, on the mountain, God is giving instructions to Moses for how the tabernacle is to be constructed and how the priests, of whom Aaron was to be the first, were to be dressed.

Really? Moses is there with God. He is so tight with God that God makes a way for Moses to see part of Him. Meanwhile, the one who is supposed to be the high priest is down with the people making an idol for them to worship. However, God is giving Moses all the details for a magnificent robe for Aaron to wear as high priest. Really? The irony jumped out at me me as I read this passage again.

As Moses, I would protest that Aaron was unworthy to have such a title and such a fine robe. However, Moses does not appear to do that. He clearly brought righteous indignation down the mountain, but he does not appear to argue with God about the choice of Aaron and who may or may not deserve to wear such a robe. He did call out to those who would be on the the Lord's side, which brought forth the Levites. He did instruct them to kill those who were worshipping the idol, which numbered about 3000 men. However, Aaron continued to live and would be adorned with that beautiful robe.

I struggle with that idea. What about Moses? He gets no fancy robe. He and God are tight. Aaron is enabling, even encouraging, the people to worship an idol. This is all just wrong.

Then again, maybe that is why I needed to read this story again. Moses was satisfied in God's presence. Of course, Moses also fasted 40 days and nights, which may have been necessary to remove his pride too. Maybe that fasting was the key to his response to God's directions.

How often do I let my pride get in the way of what God wants to do? What is is that I need to do to let God lead me?

No Vindication!

So I have been reading through the Bible chronologically this year. I get a little behind now and then, but over all I am staying up on it.  A couple of weeks ago I was struck again by the story of Joseph.

Let's do a short recap of the early part of the story before my aha! moment.
Joseph is born one of twelve sons to his father.  He is the first son of his mother, who His father loved more than the other wives. His father trusts in him. He has dreams that his brothers and parents will bow down to him. His brothers are angered and plot to kill him. One brother intervenes and says to just put him in a pit, planning later to rescue his brother. However, the brothers eventually sell Joseph to some merchants passing by their way. As a slave, Joseph serves in the house of Potiphar, a rich man in Egypt. Potiphar trusts Joseph with everything in his home. Potiphar's wife, the one thing not available to Joseph, lusts after Joseph and attempts to lure him into bed with her. After a couple of tries, Joseph flees from her, leaving behind his coat to which she was clutching. She accuses him of trying to attack her, and Potiphar throws Joseph in jail, where he is forgotten about for some time.  Eventually Joseph is able to interpret dreams for Pharoah's servants and is eventually brought out to interpret the Pharoah's dreams.

Joseph however was never vindicated. There was no visit, as far as we know, from Potiphar saying he knew that Joseph was innocent. There is nothing stated to show that Joseph's name was cleared.

I don't know about anyone else, but I struggle with this. If someone thinks I have done wrong, I am adamant about clearing my name. I do not even want there to be the slightest misunderstanding. I want my innocence to be clear. I will harp on it and stay awake at night if I think someone is mad at me because of a misunderstanding. I will kick and scream figuratively speaking until I am vindicated. But Joseph does not do that, so far as we know. He may have tried to speak up, but it does not appear that he harped on it for years as I would have. Maybe that is a lesson for me. Maybe it is my pride, or maybe my insecurity, that keeps me from letting things like that go. Either way, I need to learn to stand my ground when I have done right and let God handle the rest, rather than dwelling on it.

Now that does not mean that I do not try to address a misunderstanding? No! If I have done something without all the facts and offended someone, I can still go apologize. I just do not need to wait around and lose sleep until my name is cleared, because that may never happen.

Joseph was satisfied with being right in the eyes of The Lord, and so should I.

Working Simultaneously

The Great Commission calls us to go into all the world making disciples and baptizing them and teaching them all that Jesus had taught. Jesus's last words before His ascension were informing His disciples that they would be His testimony to Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the uttermost of the earth.

Unfortunately, many get the idea that these instructions had to happen chronologically. Once Jerusalem was reached, then Judea was to be reached, then Samaria, and the finally the uttermost. However, that is not how it was stated. It was stated that His followers would be to all those places at one time.  We as the church are to be sharing everywhere at once. We as individuals are to be sharing wherever we are as we go.  It is not here then here, but rather wherever it is that we go as we go the world over.

Reading Multiply by Francis Chan this week has reiterated that fact. I was reminded of some comments were made before we went to Africa as a family the first time. A sweet old lady asked me how we could go over there when there were still so many that needed to hear the Good News in the city in which we were living at the time. I kindly looked at her and let her know that she could share with the people in that city, while we went. I was not trying to be sarcastic, though I succeeded. I was simply trying to remind her that the job of sharing the Good News is not merely that of paid ministers and missionaries who are paid to go overseas or even in this country. Sharing the Good News is the job of every believer, and we all have our niche where God has placed us to interact with certain people.

Some might however see those who go overseas as forgetting those in the Jerusalem and Judea. I would say too that those who go overseas cannot forget those back "home". Unfortunately, sometimes family members can be the hardest to share with or least willing to hear. Our job is not to convert but to share the seed of Truth and water the seed.  It is God's job to bring fruit, according to 1Corinthians 3:6.

So get out there and sow some seeds wherever you may go today!

The Encourager Needs Encouragement

I have begun reading the Bible through in a year chronologically. It has been interesting to read it in this manner, rather than the typical reading through in the published order. As such, I am already two days into Job.

In the past, I like many others have given Job's friends a bad rap. The phrase, "with friends like that, who needs enemies?" has often been used regarding them. However, as I read Eliphaz's counsel to Job, I saw something different. Eliphaz reminded Job of the times that Job had counseled others to continue to seek God in the midst of their circumstances. Eliphaz's then counsels Job to stay the course and continue to seek God as well through the difficult days, which fall on the innocent and the wicked. Job then responds that it is just too hard and he has lost hope.

Is that not always the way?  On one hand, we might encourage others, yet they do not really know all of our story. It may be that we know the struggle within more than the hearer realizes, so it may seem simple to the one with whom we are speaking.  We may even be speaking as one having climbed out of the pit. On the other hand, we might encourage others from a place of confidence, which has never really been tested.  When the days of testing that confidence come, we must remember the words which we used to encourage others.

A few years ago, I was deeply impressed to admonish someone who was close to me regarding a particular area of struggle, and I even lead a study with others on this struggle.  I had struggled a little in this area, but I mostly came from a place of surety in what God's Word said more than my own experience. Shortly thereafter, I wrestled with that temptation like a wild animal trying to escape its predator.  I wrestled and wrestled and begged God to remove that temptation.  In time, the temptation was removed, especially as the cues were removed. Many times I had to refer myself to those very passages that I had used in admonishing the one who was close to me. Now having experienced what I did, I would be more sure about what I said rather than less so.

So was Eliphaz right? Yes, he encouraged Job to hold on to those truths that Job had shared before. Did it feel very good? No, but admonishment never does. Does it mean that we should not do it? No, hard things still need to be said, and in time they will bear fruit. Should we be prepared to deal with a struggle when we counsel others? You betcha!

Have you settled?

I started reading the Bible through in a year this week. It has been a long time since I have done it, but this year I also decided to do it chronologically. I am excited about reading it this way, rather than the general order or random picks from multiple places that do not really go together.

Today, I came to the part about Terah and his sons, which included Abram.  I am always intrigued when I read the passage. I wonder what caused Terah to take up his family and head to Canaan. Was he wanting to visit other relatives? Were there more job prospects out there? Had he heard about a land flowing with milk and honey, as it was known later? Did God call him to go there?

Why did he stop? Why did he settle before he reached his intended destination? Did he become ill and could not physically make it any farther? Did he find a land that was "good enough?" Was he nostalgic for his son, Haran, that died, so he stopped in a place called Haran? Did he find work for them all? Was he discouraged or just plain weary from the travel? Did God stop Terah from going any farther, so that Abram could be the one to go into the land?

Why did Terah settle? Literally, God only knows. However, it makes me stop to consider. Have I settled in some area of my life? Is there something more God has for me that I have not yet arrived to but have stopped moving toward?  Maybe.  Have I settled for less than believing God for all that He has promised?  Unfortunately, I can look back over the last few years and see where I have.  Have I settled for good enough? Maybe.  Have I given up hope of things ever changing in a relationship and settled for how they are?  Often.  In addition, can I see where He is moving me to get my children in a position closer to Him? Oh yeah!

Father God, I don't want to settle for good enough or close enough just because I get tired. I don't want to stop short of all you have for me to do or be. Keep me moving, Lord, with You. Keep me believing for all that You have promised. Help me never to "settle."

The Nomadic Shepherds

I find it interesting how differently we as humans view people than how God views people.

In the Christmas story of Luke 2, God sent His angels to reveal to the shepherds the birth of His only Son. They were the most common of folk. Their job was not glamorous nor gave them any position of authority at all. However God Most High chose to reveal the birth of The Lord of Lords to mere shepherds. It was not even a little announcement, but one with multitudes of heavenly host praising God. Having been convinced by these messengers, the shepherds went to find things just as it had been revealed to them. After this encounter, the shepherds went around spreading the good news. I wonder what kind of reception they got. Did anyone believe them? Did anyone care? Scripture does not tell what others who heard their tale thought of them. However it does tell that that wondered, were curious, amazed that God would reveal these things to them. How had they been treated by religious leaders? Had they been made to think that they were not worthy to be entrusted with such things?

Since we have been working with a people who are known as shepherds, this story and others about shepherds in the Word intrigue me. I am reminded that the first profession named in the Bible was a shepherd. Abel, though not the firstborn, is first recognized for his profession as a keeper of flocks. He then is recognized for his faith. Cain, Abel's brother and a worker of the land, has many descendants. The first group of Cain's descendants that have recognition for their profession are those who dwelt in tents and took care of livestock.  God apparently placed value enough on the shepherds to give them foremost listing in profession.

So why is it that the people we work amongst who have been traditionally nomadic tent dwellers and keeper of livestock and flocks get such a bad reputation? They are looked down upon by other people groups. Our particular people are looked down upon by others of the same larger group. Why is that? I don't know.

God does not see people the way we see people. God looks at the heart. God, help me to see people the way You see people. Help me to elevate those that have been downtrodden.  Help me to take the Good News to the nomadic shepherd.

Why is that Bible a big deal?

I lost my Bible a few weeks ago. I am sure it will turn up somewhere soon, but for now, it is lost. Some may wonder why that is a big deal. I had to think to myself why indeed that particular Bible is a big deal.

Am I not currently in the land of plenty of Bibles? For goodness sake, I am in the "Bible belt."  Can I not just run down to Lifeway and get another one? I could but it would not be the same. Why?

Is it because my brother gave me that Bible when I was ten, and I have held onto everything that he gave me with great sentimentality since he died twenty years ago?
Is it because I remember those many camps and choir tours as I look at and touch those skittle stained edges?
Is it because I can see my early handwriting of names of God in the cover?
Is it because of all the highlights in it from days of youth?
Is it because of the list of songs that I love that I want at my funeral?
Is it because of the notes from sermons that stuck out to me?
Is it because of the time and place markings of where God spoke to me in my life?

Why is that Bible so special? Well, truth be told is that a little of all those things go into making that particular Bible so special to me. I do hold onto things that remind me of my brother.  It has been my best friend to turn to in days of trial. It has been there when no one else was near. It gave me words to express my deep joys or deepest anguish. The stories of heroes who struggled often gave me encouragement to keep going. Those notes within are my Ebenezer of God's faithfulness unto me.  So that book of God's story is also tells my story. God's Word is alive and active and speaks new truth to me daily, revealing to me more about God and myself and my world.

So in the meantime, I will not bother getting a new Bible, because we have so many back in Africa. I will use my iPad Bible, which I gave my husband a hard time about before this. I will use my Pulaar Bible, which God may have wanted me to do anyway, so that I can retain my language while in the states.  Yes, I will continue to seek my Bible that has been my dear friend, but I pray that I will also seek God to reveal Himself anew daily to me through whichever medium He chooses.

How can you take your kids?

Ok, so the title is an abbreviated questions from one I got a few weeks ago. "How can you tantalize taking your kids over there?" I think the lady who asked me this was really just trying to understand what life is like for our children.

She wondered if it was safe where we live overseas. We feel very safe where we live. Does that mean we have had no issues there? No. Our house was broken into, but that happens here in the states often. The burglars likely thought no one was home, and nothing has happened since then. Have our children never been bullied? No, they have been bullied, but that happens here too. We addressed the issue with the bullies and talked with their families and others to see that it is not repeated. We feel as safe there as anyone would feel here.

She wondered maybe if my children had as good of an education as hers do here. Well our children are home schooled by me.  They may not have the socialization in school as hers do, but they socialize outside of school.  There are areas that are not my forte, but I do my best to fill in those gaps. I would venture to say that my kids know a lot more in a lot of their studies than many of their peers in the states.

I am sure there are lots of things that caused that question to be raised in her mind and in the mind of others. My answer was simply this,"God knew that He would be giving us these children before He ever called us to go to Africa. God knew where He had called us to go long before the children were born.  God was not ignorant of either the blessing of children or His call to go when the other took place. If God did it, then I must trust Him with the rest."

I have seen a lot of ups and downs in the lives of those around me in 2012. I really do not understand it all. However I trust that God who is sovereign holds each of these situations in His hands, just like He holds our family situation.  I don't know how that young mother will raise her boys to know what an awesome dad they had, that died fighting for his country. I don't know how God will use the young couple who carried twins through months of bed rest to only spend minutes and hours with them once they were born before they went to be with Jesus. I do not know how God will work in the lives of friends who so desperately want to adopt a precious child.  I do not know how God will work in each of these, but this I know, "He's got the whole work in His hands."