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Hello, I am a mother of three living with my husband in Africa. I have been blogging for seven years but still find myself very technologically challenged. I make lots of mistakes, but life is a journey. Come join me on the journey!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Living between the extremes!

Now before I go too far, I will make this painful admission now.  We are among the richest in the area in which we live.  Though we have not been to all the homes, I feel pretty safe in saying that.  This is not to brag at all, because I would venture to say that all Americans who have a job and live in a house, rental or owned, are as wealthy if not wealthier than those we live around.  Anyone who has been to a third world country knows this.  I felt like I needed to say that before going into what I really needed to say. 

We live in a town that is very much a mix of statuses.  Where we lived before, in the capital, it was a mix, but there were streets between those who had much and those with not so much.  Here is very different, because you have a hut essentially right next to a very nice house. 

On one side of us is a home built much like ours, with a cement wall around it, since it has the same landlord.  The husband is a doctor who travels a lot and has his own car.  His wife and children are there all the time and have a househelper.  The children go to the private Catholic school, not because they are Catholic but it is seen as a better education, which costs money.  They have a television and refrigerator, thus they have electricity, and they have running water.  They have nice furniture and are very comfortable.

Yesterday I was invited into another compound by a lady who lives there.  All I knew of it was the wood thatch fence and one of the young men that lived there.  As we walked into the compound, she went straight to the cement building in the center.  As I approached the entry way, I saw that there were four doors, each with it's own lock.  She told me she rents her room.  It was dark, because she has no electricity and the sun was going down.  I did not notice the well as we went into the compound, but I know there must have been because there was no running water.  There were no windows to speak of.  She invited me to sit with her on her mattress (not bed), one of two in the room, her only furniture.  She had a sheet hanging up separating her "room" from the "children's room".  She is a widow with several children.  She said she had no food for her family and asked me for work.  I found myself very uncomfortable and almost speechless as I sat in the most humble of surroundings.  She said her knees hurt, likely arthritis.  I prayed for her body to be well and that she would have peace, especially as a widow.  I tried to go a short time later to take her some food but she was not there.  Despite her situation, she was not embarrassed to invite me in to her home, but she did so warmly.

Even as I write this, I contemplate the humble entrance of our Lord into this world.  There was no mattress and no curtains.  Nothing but the hay for the animals.   "Away in a manger...."

Sunday, December 6, 2009

More opportunities for prayer!

Well since I went into the details of trying to make visits to new homes and still make visits to the ones we have met in the last post, I will not revisit that here.  However, I will let you know, that often the person you first make contact with in a home seems to be your strongest contact and you get nailed down as a friend to that person.  Early on, like the first week, as we walked as a family, we found a home where there were men and women and children out in the street with whom we could talk.  It seemed the perfect place to stop.  It actually wound up being a combination of two households.  The one most interested in holding a conversation with me was an older teenage girl.  It was ok, since I needed the language help and she was willing to without wanting me to make her a paid teacher.  She helped me interpret from our other language, and I helped her with her English a bit.  But when it comes to making an impact on a household, we really want to focus on the older generations.  Plus, I would rather have a friend my age or same station of life.  But once again, a contact is a contact, no matter the age. 

Well on subsequent visits, the young girl was unavailable, out studying for school or something.  So I began talking to whomever was there.  Once it was the grandmother in one of the homes, who was so helpful by telling the names of everything that was around us, from things on the ground to the animals going by us.  Sometimes it was only one lady who did not talk much, but at least I was able to hear them talk some to the other neighbors as they passed and we talked about the children playing.

On Friday, it started out like that but did not end there.  The lady who was out front invited me in to greet the matriarch of her home and a lady they had visiting.  I greeted the matriarch, who I had met once before. (It made me feel better, because she did not remember my name.  I often forget theirs when I meet so many but get so embarrassed about it.)  I also greeted the lady they had visiting.  She proceeded to bless me and our family, though it was the first time we had met.  Then after a time I went back out side, so I could watch the children, ie make sure Mariama was playing nice.

After a while one of the other ladies from the house across the way came out just to greet me, before going back to what she was doing.  A short time later, someone from behind the fence was trying to get my attention.  I went over to greet whoever it was, and it was the grandmother from the previous visit.  We chatted about things for a while.  Then she shared with me how she had broken her hip 9 months ago and that it still hurts so much.  It hurts when she lies down and she has to use a cane to walk.  She had never shared any of this with me before, and I had just figured it was normal old age.  I took the opportunity to pray with her, for which she was very grateful.  Open doors with a woman of influence, praise Him!  Ask the Father to provide more open doors and the opportunity to share more with these homes.  Ask the Father to give her relief from her pain, so that she can rest better, and may she know it is Him.

Going deeper with a friend!

Well, I had an exciting visit from a friend yesterday morning but before I tell about the visit, I must give some background.  As of Friday, we have been in our town for 2 months, other than the two trips out of town.  We have had 6 weeks of language class.  Every week it is a struggle to balance study and visiting with neighbors, both of which are crucial to our purpose in being here.  I have been frustrated by trying to find time to meet new homes while still having time to visit the ones we have already gotten to know.  It would be nice if just once someone would come to visit us instead of always saying, "I haven't seen you in a long time.  Where have you been?"  Although, 2 months is not really that long, especially in this culture.

While in Dakar, I had the opportunity to see an old friend of ours with whom a lot of personal time and interest was invested.  When we left, she was a newlywed with a new baby and a good business, and all was well.  Sometime after that her business went by the wayside.  In the last year or so, her husband took another wife and brought her into their same small house.  My friend was 7 months pregnant at the time and the stress of everything caused her to have the baby early, who did not survive.  Things have gone from bad to worse and now it looks like they will be getting a divorce.  But on top of that, without a job, she has no money to provide for her son, so her husband's mother is now caring for the child.  Terribly painful story that absolutely tore me apart!

So this week, I was visiting the house I had written about before in "New friends!"  I am not really sure why I was prompted to tell them about my friend in Dakar but I did.  Maybe it is because I needed a story to tell so I could talk at my own pace, rather than them talking so fast that I can not understand them.  Maybe it was the Father's prompting.  I did not really know at the time, but I got more of an answer yesterday.

My friend (the one who had called everyone together to pray) came by to see me rather early in the morning, at 9:00.  For the most part only people who are working are out that early, or women are on their way to the market, but no one is visiting that early.  I tried to suggest we sit out side because that is what they normally do, but she was not wanting to sit.  So I thought maybe she wanted to visit inside.  I invited her in and we chatted a bit and I gave her some coffee.  She told me how everyone in her household says how good I am and her husband had told her to come see me. 

Then as I sat on the floor, she shared with me about having 5 children but that now she has 4 because one of the oldest had died some time ago.  I was so stunned that she was sharing such personal information with me, because that is not typical.  (She shared more with me that did not register with me at the time but has since, which I will try to make sure I understood later.)  I prayed for her and for the Father to grant her peace in her heart because that can cause fear regarding her other children as well and because the Father knows how a heart hurts for the death of a child.  I told her my mother's story of having a child die and then the peace that only the Father can give when a child dies or a child goes far away.  After I prayed for her, she left thanking me and telling me how happy she was because of me.

She came back a short while later with a bag of grapefruits because she knew I liked them and that Mariama had eaten one the other night at their house.

I have had my first visitor and it was a big time visit!  I have no idea what the Father is doing, but He is definitely doing something.  Keep lifting up my friend and her household, that they may all come to know the Truth very soon.