As I sit on the airplane heading back to the DRC after vacation, my thoughts turn to our real lives. We have called Kinshasa home for six months now. We have been in French language study for about nine months of the last year. We have survived one trimester of our son at boarding school, which ended well despite the rough start. We left Kinshasa with him and are returning without him. Girls have thrived in their school and are looking forward to returning to their friends, even if it is school.
Though we are still very much in language study, we are also beginning to take on new responsibilities. Part of my language learning time will involve coaching our new teammates as they begin language acquisition. Part of Rich’s language time will be in preparation for training opportunities. As we return it all seems overwhelming. An overwhelming schedule. An overwhelming task for which I feel so inadequate. However it is a task that does not deserve to be done from a feeling of inadequacy. He has called me to this task, and He equips us for that which He calls us to do.
The church sermon on Sunday was from Galatians 5. The pastor talked about our need to walk by the Spirit, not in the flesh. If I give myself a list of to dos to make my life seem more spiritual, I.e. depending on having Christian music on all the time to keep me calm, I am still trying to live this life in the flesh. As I have tried to do this in the recent past, I know it only puts a temporary fix. Then when the bandaid comes off, that old flesh is exposed also. We must live the life dependent on the Spirit.
Then yesterday and today I was able to read a book that my mom sent me for Christmas. It is Audacious by Beth Moore. Yes, I read it in one day. I could not stop reading. Why? Because it hit me right at this spot. God has an audacious love for me, for each of us, that lead Him to plan to send His Son before anyone ever knew my name, or yours. When God sacrificed a lamb to clothe Adam and Eve from their sin, God was already planning that Jesus would defeat the enemy by being the final sacrifice.
The Bible has lots of commands and instructions for how to live. But what is the greatest one? To love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. The second is to love my neighbor as myself. When we love God audaciously, we will love others. When we serve out of duty, we will burn out. When we serve God out of that audacious love, He will do more than we can imagine.
So will I return to Kinshasa from meetings that talk about faithfulness, a sermon about living in the Spirit, and reading a book about loving Jesus audaciously, and live the same run down life? Or will I live it in abandon to Him and be willing to love Him audaciously? Will I let myself be lead by the Spirit rather than my to do list? Do those things need to get done? Yes, but who will get the glory for how I serve?
My word for 2018: Audacious!
Be Audacious!
Love audaciously!
Live audaciously!
As a side note, in thinking about this word “audacious,” I could not help but think of the movie, “Hope Floats.” Is there a time in your life when you were Audacious? Has life worn you down and made you doubt the audacious love that God has for you? Have you gotten comfortable in your abilities and stopped needing Him? “Get out there and get the stink off you!” Let the Lord blow a fresh breath of audacious love over you! Be Audacious!
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